pass me the hot sauce
by TheVeryCheesyAuthor
Summary: Midoriya Izuku didn't think that saving one little bunny would land him in prison, but fate turned against him. Now he's just gotta learn to survive and adapt. PrisonAU!
1. Chapter 1

_a prison AU_ since i _haven't read one around here. enjoy!_

* * *

"Oi, new Fish coming through!"

Izuku Midoriya wasn't sure if he was going to pee his pants or cry first. If it wasn't for the not-so-gentle white-haired guard that was nudging him into the general direction he was supposed to go towards, he was sure that his legs would've stopped moving.

"Look, he's trembling like a baby bird!"

"Shaking like a leaf!"

"Just one fish today? He's stealing all the spotlight!"

The laughing around him had his armpits sweating through the orange jumpsuit. If his hands weren't handcuffed together, he was sure that he would've bitten off all his fingernails. The looks that some of the prisoners had him reeling in panic.

"Settle down ya'll."

Izuku spun in relief to meet his savior. The nice guard that spoke glared at the inmates with dead tired eyes and a baton in his hand. Immediately, the entire cell became quiet and focused their curious and hungry eyes on him.

"This is Prisoner 7150," was all the nice guard said before he left.

The door shut with a clang.

His fellow inmates stared at him.

Half of them had dark shadows cast over their faces, and the other half had menacing grins. There were too many guys to count that was buff and had tattoos. Most of them had more piercings than he had fingers.

He stared back.

They grinned.

"H-Hi, my name is I-Izuku M-Midoriya"-he stammered out and bowed-"Nice to meet you all!"

It was like the atmosphere had suddenly changed.

"The new fish is sooo adorable!" Someone squealed.

"Hey bro! Name's Kirishima, nice to meet ya!"

The redhead who just spoke extended his hands to shake his. As Izuku clasped the man's rough and calloused hands, he couldn't help but notice the intricate tattoo sleeve on his arm. When he looked up, a pair of ruby eyes were shining with curiosity.

"So what did you get into Yuuei Prison for?" A grinning blond asked, "Theft? Drugs? Murder-"

"No, no, no!" Izuku was horrified.

He waved his hands in front of his blushing face, mortified that someone would think that he could've killed another person. More people crowded around him and he squeaked.

"Then what did you do? Yuuei has max security!"

"I... Uh, trespassed a zoo-" Izuku said.

"What for?"

"You don't even look like an adult!"

"Killing a lion?"

"Dang, kid!"

"What happened?"

"Well I saw a bunny and I reallywantedtosaveitfromthelionthatwasabouttokillitand-" Izuku mumbled.

"Woah, kid, slow down."

"Well I saw a bunny and it was trapped inside the zoo. It somehow got into the lion's enclosure and the lion looked like it was about to kill it so I took a stick and threw it at the lion. And then the zookeepers demanded compensation for the attack and then said I was trespassing, and then the judge decided to give me a thirty-six-month sentence because I couldn't pay the bail..."

Somehow because of that rant, he felt better. His chest felt a little lighter and the reality of the situation wasn't as bad as he thought it was. If all the people were as nice as Kirishima, then he was sure he could make it through.

"Well, that sucks, man." The blond haired man grimaced, "If it feels any better, I climbed an electricity pole because I saw a cat up there. Maybe it's because of my dyed hair and piercings, but the police claimed that I was trespassing and causing civil disobedience-so here I am."

Izuku stared at the energetic blond man with his jaw wide open.

"Yikes."

"At least I got to meet my bros here! Speaking of which, where's Bakubro?"

"He is most definitely asleep," A blue haired man said.

Izuku stared openly at the blue-haired man in front of him. Sure, his green hair was strange, but the man in front of him had _dark blue hair!_ The only other person he knew that had blue-hair was the retired FBI Tensei Iida. On top of that, the man in front of him looked nothing like a delinquent because of his stiff posture and metal-framed glasses.

"A-Are you by any chance related to Tensei Iida?"

The blue-haired man flushed, "Y-Yes, I am his younger brother, Tenya."

Izuku stared in awe.

"Never mind that!" Tenya's hands did a strange chopping motion, "Do you know where you are about to inhabit?"

Tenya certainly had a strange way with his words.

"Y-Yeah, Cell Block C8."

Immediately after he said that the whole room went silent. Some of the inmates that had been playing chess even froze, their pieces still in their hands. Another inmate choked on his water. From all the attention that was focused on him again, Izuku immediately started to get nervous.

"D-Did you just say C8?"

"Wait but isn't that Stains' Block?"

"Definitely Stains' Block."

"New Fish from last week disappeared after two hours with him."

As the other inmates kept talking more and more about his supposed roommate, Izuku turned paler and paler. He even could hear some of the gossip coming from the chess table about how Stain had somehow poisoned one of the previous inmates with _sugar._

"Guards Aizawa and All Might had to go in there personally to restrain Stain."

"Oh God, poor Izuku-"

"WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON HERE? I'M TRYING TO NAP GODDAMN WHY IS IT SO HARD FOR Y'ALL PIPSQUEAKS TO KEEP QUIET? I'M GOING TO KILL WHOEVER IS MAKING THIS MUCH NOISE!"

"Oh crap, that sounds like Kacchan," Izuku muttered underneath his breath, "Ah crap."

The entire room seemed to scatter at the sound of the man's booming voice. Immediately, the people surrounding him scattered and the floors vibrated from angry stomps. Only Kirishima and the blond-haired-man-who-had-climbed-up-a-pole had stayed in the general area.

"Bakubro, this New Fish is assigned to C8! We have to save him!"

"He's going to get completely destroyed!"

"Who the hell-"

The man's voice died out when he saw Izuku.

"H-Hey Kaachan-" Izuku twiddled his thumbs nervously, "Remember me?"

If Izuku wasn't in prison, the sight before him would've been amusing. His childhood best friend, Katsuki, had his mouth closing and opening like a fish. His angry expression went from a look of pale horror to a mask of sheer confusion.

"DEKU? WHY THE HELL IS THIS SHITTY NERD HERE? DID YOU WANDER HERE ON ACCIDENT? WHAT THE HELL-"

The door slammed open and the mean, white-haired guard strode out. Katsuki's hands, which had been unconsciously semi-strangling Izuku, went still. Izuku's mouth went slack when the guard glared at him.

"Katsuki Bakugo, keep your voice down before I forcibly do so."

"Yes... Sir," The blond haired man seethed.

"Good. Prisoners, it is time for Roll Call and Curfew."

* * *

"So, _Kaacha_ n huh? How cute-"

"Shut the hell up!"

Kirishima didn't even have to look to see Bakugo's face heat up.

"Bakubro, Izuku isn't going to survive tonight. There's no way. Remember last time? Stain managed to gouge out both the Fish's eyes and cut off both of his legs _and there_ was still somehow not enough evidence to get him caught. Do you think-"

"Shut the fuck up, shitty hair."

Bakugo rolled onto his side and strained his ears against the cell wall. To his surprise, there was no noise that came from the block next door. No screaming, no liquid hitting the floor... _It was just silence._

And he felt strangely relieved.

"Chill, _Kaachan."_

* * *

" _Non,_ non _,_ non, I bought earplugs from the missionary just for today... But new Fish hasn't made a single sound yet. How interesting," Aoyama murmured, "Not that it's not _bien."_

"From the rumors that I have heard, he has killed silently before," Tokoyami replied.

* * *

It was an uneasy night in the entire prison. Everyone waited with baited breaths for _any sound_ that came from Cell Block C8. Even Sato, who had a habit of eating in the middle of the night, hadn't even dared to touch a single cookie.

For the next eight hours, it was a waiting game.

* * *

"Prisoner 1312!"

"Here!"

Everyone was answering absentmindedly. Even Guard Aizawa, who was in charge of doing the Roll Call, kept glancing at the empty spot next to Stain. There was more and more uneasy shuffling in the crowd, and pitying glances were thrown towards the empty spot as he got closer to the end of the page.

"... Prisoner 7150."

Silence answered him.

Everyone stared at the empty spot as if Izuku Midoriya could suddenly appear.

"And another bites the dust-"

"Wait, wait, I'm here! Sorry I was late!" A panicked voice answered him, "I thought roll call was in the cafeteria!"

Izuku Midoriya came bursting through the double doors and into the common room. His gasping breaths signaled to everyone that _he was very much alive._ More than ten pairs of eyes searched for wounds and any dried blood.

Shocked eyes stared at the green-haired boy.

"P-Prisoner 7150?"

"Here!"

"Y-You're alive?"

* * *

 _Check out my Etsy shop and instagram! Both of them are under the username/shop name: theverycheesyauthor. Thanks!_

 _also, would you guys prefer to have like a main ship or a few small side ships? or no couples at all? maybe we could throw in some villain action in there? should i make this a crackfic? what do y'all think!_


	2. Chapter 2

"Are you real?"

Izuku trembled as the inmates around him poked his head and his body repeatedly. Even though these people were surprisingly nice and caring, he was confused about why they were so concerned about his wellbeing.

"U-Um, guys, I appreciate you all acting like this... B-But can someone tell me why? I-I mean thanks but I-I'm just confused!"

Their big fingers and black tattoos were intimidating close up and Midoriya couldn't help but stutter and almost wet his pants. Even though it had been over twelve hours, he was still scared by these strangely nice criminals.

"We're just surprised that you're alive, bro!"

Right after the buff redhead said that, a black haired man slapped him on the back of his head. Sensing a fight was about to break out, Midoriya's small frame tensed up immediately. However, the redhead laughed merrily at the man's exasperated face.

"Kirishima, we can't just outright say that. But yeah, we're glad you're alive."

Because of his short height, Midoriya could only stare at their chests in confusion, not daring to look up at their pierced faces.

"Yeah, Stain is notorious for killing his roommates!" Electric yellow hair appeared in his vision, "How did you survive the night?"

"Not you too, Kaminari!"

"What's your secret, _monsieur?_ " A blond asked.

"K-Killing?" Izuku's face turned white with horror, "Stain-san would never do that! He's too nice!"

The cafeteria turned quiet. Ten identical blank faces turned to his direction and Izuku's face flushed red again. Katsuki, who had been half listening to their conversation, had half-eaten bacon fall out of his mouth. Even Tokoyami stopped reading his poetry.

"Nice? Did you just call _Stain_ nice?"

"What kind of world are you living in?"

"Well, Stain-san even offered me his extra pillows and blankets and played a round of chess! Even though it was a bit creepy in the beginning and he kept asking me my opinion on morals and murderers, he was really nice after I answered his questions... So yeah, I think Stain-san is nice."

It was as if a switch had been flipped on. Izuku, who had been cowering moments ago, became angry and his voice gradually grew louder and louder in volume. The guard who had been snoozing disinterestedly, now had both eyes opened as he listened to Izuku rant.

The redhead had been the first person to break the tension.

"Defending Stain's honor! How manly!"

Izuku blushed as others clapped his back in congratulations and awe. He could feel Katsuki's impressed red gaze on the back of his neck and he turned around to give a small smile. He was rewarded with middle fingers and a raised, pierced eyebrow.

"How brave!"

"What a mad banquet of darkness..."

* * *

"Izuku! We're going to give you a tour since you're a permanent member of Holding Block A! Congratulations!"

"Thanks...?"

The green haired man was immediately dragged into a group of three, hyperactive men. Even though their gang tattoos and piercings threw him off, he couldn't help but feel grateful and welcome.

"Alright, so you know where this is- Cells A through D are in this Block area. We generally have Holding Block A through C who live here, but we generally have some other intense dudes," Kaminari suddenly frowned, "Those are the people you don't want to cross. They live in Holding Block C-9 through C-16. They all have at least five serious charges like arson and murder."

"I live next door..." Midoriya's voice was small.

They froze.

"They're probably not that bad-"

"Speak of the devil," Sero hissed.

A man with combed blond hair strode in with a sneer. His prisoner uniform was somehow ironed, and he stopped in front of Izuku and licked his lips.

"What do we have here? A Holding Block A member? You think you're so badass don't you-"

He suddenly collapsed and a metallic man behind him appeared in sight. He rubbed his hand sheepishly on the back of his neck and Izuku stared, fascinated, at the metallic gray tattoos that seemed to cover his whole body.

"Testutestu bro!"

"Kirishima bro!"

Kirishima hugged the gray man and shook hands with him. Izuku could only stare in surprise as the gray man lugged the unconscious blond over his shoulder and gave them a small wave.

"That was Monoma who was being a dick just now, and Testutestu is Kirishima's twin. They're both from Holding Block B, and most of them in that Block are generally people with less serious charges like attempted murder or bank robbing," Kaminari explained, "In case you're wondering, Monoma tried to poison his nanny because she wouldn't let him spend his weekly allowance to buy Yeezys."

Izuku let out a surprised squeak.

"Anyways, here is the cafeteria. Lunch Rush is the only employed cook, and four of us take turns every week to help him out. Be careful not to make anyone on lunch duty mad that day though, they'll do some serious shit to your food," Kirishima warned.

"Yeah, Sero insulted Monoma's fashion sense and Monoma ended up giving him mashed potatoes stuffed in a nasty sock," Kaminari shuddered, "It smelled and looked disgusting."

"I can never look at mashed potatoes the same way again..."

As they walked past the warden's office, Izuku had to resist trying to peep inside.

"Warden's office, blah blah, the Warden looks like an oversized mouse but don't tell him that because he gets offended easily. Oh, and this is the common room. We have parties like basically like every other Friday, and everyone is welcome to join. We usually get to watch National Geographic and we get board games, which is way better than the weather channel."

On the common room tables were picture books and lego blocks. As Izuku passed by, he could see some inmates piecing together giant puzzle pieces like children.

"Oh, and this is the shower room."

The mood suddenly changed in the group and their grins turned into solemn frowns. Izuku couldn't see anything wrong with the showers and he could only stare at his new friends in confusion.

"You don't want to shower here without anyone you trust. There have been multiple drownings last year, beatings, and _rape_ in this room because security is pretty 'lax in this area. You'd definitely want to avoid this general area at night and never, ever come in here with anyone that have crimes that revolve around sexual activities or multiple murders."


End file.
